OCD & Rituals of Chinese New Year

Happy Chinese New Year 4709- the year of The Water Dragon

Chinese New Year begins today, January 23, 2012, on the new moon, and is the biggest holiday in China. This one is particularly big, as the Dragon year is the most auspicious and popular of all.

According to www.chinesefortunecalendar.com  legend has it that dragons come from heaven and 9 of them were sent to help the first emperor of the Ming Dynasty. When it was time for them to return, the emperor tried to keep them by putting the 6th dragon under a magic spell so he couldn't leave. The other dragons wouldn't return without him, but they all refused to work for the Emperor and changed their identities and remained in China.
Since then, they have been used as symbols:

Dragon #1 is carved into music instruments, such as violins.
Dragon #2 is on many different handles of weapons.
Dragon #3 is the symbol of safety, harmony and peace.
Dragon#4 can be found on the big bells as a symbol of protection and alertness.
Dragon #5 s the symbol of fire and smoke. His image is often found in temples and on incense burners.
Dragon #6 is a symbol of strength, longevity, and good luck.
Dragon #7's symbol can be found in law offices, courts, and jails.
Dragon #8 is the symbol of knowledge or education and can often be found on books.
Dragon #9 is the water dragon, and is the symbol used to prevent fire and disasters.


Chinese New Year is celebrated for weeks and there is much preparation. Chinese history is steeped in traditions, and as the Water Dragon is the luckiest year of all in Chinese culture, it is the year more people will marry, give birth, buy homes, and open businesses because of increased chances of success. Also, many rituals will be performed in order to attract luck. In addition, there are many  superstitions which they will adhere to. These may pose difficulties for some people, especially people with OCD and related disorders, because of fears of misfortune if the superstitions are not heeded.

This is from   http://gohongkong.about.com/od/hongkongfestivals/tp/CNYsuperstition.htm "Chinese New Year may be a time for friends, family and fun, but is also a time for foreboding as the festival is riddled with superstitions. The Chinese, including Hong Kongers, place much stock in the rites and rituals in Chinese New Year superstitions. Check out our top Chinese New Year superstition tips below.
1. Dirty Doings
Put your feet up and relax. Certainly the most enjoyable of the Chinese New Year superstitions, sweeping and cleaning is strictly forbidden. The Chinese believe cleaning means you'll sweep all of your good luck out the front door.
2. Time to Come Clean
Before you can enjoy number two, you need to give the house a full spring clean, before putting cleaning tools in the cupboard on New Year's Eve.
3. Read Between the Lines
Be sure to stock up on reading materials before Chinese New Year, as Hong Kong's bookshops will be padlocked tight. In Cantonese, book is a homonym for 'lose'.
4. Choppy Waters
Make sure you avoid rough seas in the new year by not buying shoes over the holiday period. In Cantonese, shoes are a homonym for 'rough'.
5. Balance the Books
If you're in debt, it's time to dip into your pockets and pay people off. The Chinese believe that if you start the new year in the red, you'll finish it the same way.
6. Ghostly Conversations
Caught round a campfire over the holiday period? No ghost stories. Tales of death, dying and ghosts is considered supremely inauspicious, especially during Chinese New Year.
7. Lady in Red
Chinese New Year is packed with colors, and while all the colors of the rainbow bring good luck, it's the color red that is considered the ultimate luck bringer.
8. Sweet Year
Hong Kongers have a sweet touch at the best of times, but Chinese New Year offers the perfect chance to raid the sweet shop, as eating candies is said to deliver a sweeter year.
9. Feel the Breeze
Welcome in the New Year with a blast of fresh air, opening your windows is said to let in good luck.
10. Get to the Point
Sharp objects are said to be harbingers of bad luck, as their sharp points cut out your good luck, pack them away.You should also avoid the hairdressers or you'll have your good luck chopped off."

Besides this, your own personal horoscope will determine whether or not you will have a good year. This year, 2012, is supposed to be good for "rabbits," not so good for "dogs," and neutral for "rams." also, the unlucky direction is "Yellow 5," so don't have any repairs done this year, until next February 9th, in the southeast part of your home or else you will bring bad fortune upon your household. I would be here all day if I tried to explain everything else, like how the 5 elements, water, fire, metal, air, and earth factor into this.

I am exhausted from just reading these things! In any event, I wish you all a very Happy and Healthy Chinese New Year!

OCD & Can Human Energy Manipulate Electronics?

Can human energy manipulate electronics- and what effect do electronics have on people? Some people claim electronic devices freeze or malfunction when they are near, or emotional. This is a something I have been wondering about for a long time. It is one of those controversial subjects- some people believe it and others think it is total quackery.

I found this interesting, as I have personally experienced "electronic madness" and increased OCD symptoms during emotional times. I thought perhaps it was because I became so nervous that I wasn't operating my electronics correctly, causing them to misbehave. But how would that affect lights that blew out? Some people who know me will attest to this happening.

Also, lately it seems as if everything I touch generates a nasty shock, and not just in winter. I found out that this is because of a build up in the “electric field strength” which interacts with electrons and ions. I guess my personal electric field conducts the air around me more than others.

 There is much well-known evidence that people can manipulate their personal energy, but does this translate into manipulating electronics? Personally, I studied Tai Chi for many years, and the principal was to move your “Chi,” your personal energy, above the waist so it can flow through you and give you strength and energize you. I also took Yoga, which is about “Prana,” – the vital, life-sustaining energy force that nourishes the body. I could feel my energy move around while in a Yoga pose, and after practicing Tai Chi I could feel the energy in the palms of my hands, like a magnet.

I found this site, http://www.exploreyourspirit.com/blog/2010/05/28/can-human-energy-fields-affect-electronics/- where the author, Kala Ambrose,, answers a readers question. the following is from her blog and the picture of the human energy fields is from her web site…

 "Thanks for writing with a most intriguing question. You ask – “Are there people who can affect clocks, etc without knowing it”?...The short answer is Yes and it has been studied, researched and discussed by people in both the spiritual and scientific realms.

"As an intuitive, I’ve seen auras since childhood. Over the years, I began to study what I saw in the aura, observing the energetic patterns and shapes as well as short energy bursts that I would see erupting from the body, similar to what occurs when the sun emits a solar flare. These energetic bursts are capable of disrupting electronics and are felt by other people who have intuitive ability and are sensitive to energy. Some people are aware of the energy they can build and for others it is a complete surprise when it occurs.

 I receive reports each year from people who have experiences including turning street lights on and off as they pass by them. Others affect the performance of radios, clocks, computers and televisions or cause lights, security alarms and other electronics in their home to turn off and on repeatedly. For many years, I was not able to wear a watch, as invariably, when I did, the watch would malfunction or stop completely.

There are a variety of physical, emotional and spiritual reasons for why this happens. For some people, it occurs only when their emotions are running very high and for others it was a random event occurring only when they were going through puberty. Some of these people are tapping into what is described in parapsychology as psychokinesis/telekinesis (PK/TK). While there are skeptics who will say that the human body is not capable of affecting these fields, those who have experienced doing so first hand see the results…

A form of psychokinesis/telekinesis was recently featured in the film with George Clooney entitled The Men Who Stare at Goats, which focused on the US Army’s research into psi abilities. Another example would be the fictional book and film by Stephen King entitled Carrie, which displayed an extreme and negative show of psi ability with PK/TK force."

There has also been notable scientific parapsychological research on what is known as “The Pauli Effect.” This is about Wolfgang Pauli, a well known physicist.  Seems that Pauli and I have something in common…

From the website http://www.library.ethz.ch/exhibit/pauli/effekt_pauli_e.html  I found out that The Pauli Effect “ is a phenomenon that was greatly feared among Pauli's colleagues, particularly the experimental physicists: the "Pauli Effect". The latter manifested itself in that technical installations would unexpectedly fail in the presence of Pauli: experiments were unsuccessful, machines gave up the ghost, apparatus was broken. Otto Stern is said to have forbidden Wolfgang Pauli to enter his institute for fear of such malfunctions. Pauli himself was conscious of this peculiar talent and was delighted with such comic events.

I found this to very thought provoking and interesting. I recently watched a show titled ‘Superhumans,” where a man could make metal objects stick to him. He was scrutinized in a secure laboratory environment, and was deemed to be “authentic.” It is a well known fact that high electromagnetic fields can cause nervousness. In researching, I came upon web sites that claim there are electronic weapons using electromagnetic energy that can freak people out, and even burn houses down. Who really knows what humans are capable of doing?

Speaking of electronics, here is a product  that may enhance yours…

Camtica enables you to create professional screen recordings, presentations, tutorials and more. You can record any desktop activity with voice, webcam and animated mouse clicks. The resulting video can be saved in various formats including AVI and WMV.

Check it out here...

http://jiteco.com/screen_recorder_software.html

OCD & Is 2012 the End of the World?

As we know, this stands to be a very interesting year in several ways. In the forefront, this is the year that Mayan calendar ends, and some people predict that means the end of the world. Looking around, I came across many websites completely dedicated to this. One of them is  http://www.december212012.com/  Here I found a treasure trove of articles about the Mayan and Hopi prophecies, galactic alignment and consequential polar shift, the I Ching, Edgar Cayce- even Einstein, and it all points to a global disaster of epic proportions occurring on or near December 21, 2012. There is also something entitled The 11:11 prophecy- people that are drawn to those numbers are being given a signal, there is a message being sent to them. They are chosen to usher in the “Age of Aquarius,” a new spiritual beginning due to occur on 12/21/12.

Further research informed me there are people compiling survival kits, hoarding supplies, and stockpiling food and water. There is an “end of the world” countdown clock in Mexico, and an end of the world calendar for sale- “the last calendar you’ll ever need.” There are several end of the world blogs as well, and it seems as if  peopleare getting rich selling end of the world supplies from the Internet.

While some people may find this all amusing, others are severely stressed out by the approaching date. Some people with OCD or related disorders may be having a difficult time right now, ritualizing in order to stop the feared event. I came upon this article by Jay Michaelson- http://www.religiondispatches.org/archive/culture/5474/religious_belief_or_mental_illness/ Michaelson says that we are being caught up in a general anxiety, which is being fed to us in the form of movies, and other media that are preying on our doubts and fears. As doubt and fear are huge components of OCD, it is easy to see how certain people can become really freaked out!

There are many other sites that state the world will NOT end, that the calendar marks an astronomical event, which is the earth in the center of our galaxy, but they weren’t as entertaining or dramatic as the doomsday ones. I did find out that the ancients knew quite a bit about Astronomy and I question where they got that advanced knowledge. However, I believe that since they wrote their calendars many thousands of years ago, all ancient civilizations simultaneously ended their calendars with earth in the galactic center, as the astronomical cycle would begin again.

I don’t believe the world will end, or that anything will happen at all, except for what humans do to each other as the date approaches. Remember the Millennium and Y2K? I think we should realize that there are people who will try to take advantage of others at this time. Stop and think about this- if the end of the world is really coming and these people really believe it – why are they making lots of money? They are obviously planning for their futures. TV shows make money on advertising for these programs, and movies can rake in millions.

So, to those of you who are worried about the end coming- stop and think about why there is so much commotion about it – MONEY- and money will be no good to anyone if the world ends, will it? I hope we all make lots of money this year and I hope you enjoy the New Year stress free. I wish everyone a GREAT 2012!

OCD and Attention Dilemmas (ADD)

It is well known that many people with OCD have related disorders. For me, one of them has been Attention Deficit Disorder, which has annoyed me since childhood. There are several types of ADD, and they manifest themselves in different ways.

When I was in school, here were several boys who were being extremely disruptive in class. One of them was eventually removed because he would not remain in his seat. I’m betting those boys had Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, ADHD- the over-active version. With me, it was totally different. I clearly remember being in algebra class and being unable to concentrate. This went on for the entire semester. It got to the point that I was completely lost. As the teacher was explaining formulas and equations, my mind just drifted off to another land. Perhaps, as my sister-in-law Cathy says, I should have been taught in a way that I could understand, because I just could not get it, and fell so far behind that I failed the class. That was just one of my problems focusing as a child. I didn’t realize it until much later, but that was also caused by Attention Deficit Disorder, and a specific type that is mostly found in girls, called limbic ADD.

The symptoms of Limbic ADD can continue right into adulthood, and they are- inability to pay attention (especially to things found distasteful or boring,) mild depression, low energy, procrastination, poor sleep. For those of you who think you may have it, I found this information about Limbic ADD at
 http://www.adhd-health.com/philosophy/adhd-6types-type3-5.php

“Limbic ADD

The Limbic System:  Includes the thalamus and hypothalamus, regulates emotions, emotional memories, influences the hormone system, has a relay and gating function for sensory information, control of motivation and drives.

Natural Treatment:

• Diet. ADD people have a different metabolism to average people and so do depressed people.

• Omega-3 fish oil.

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and/or biofeedback training.

• Aerobic exercise daily for 30-45 minutes, preferably outside.

• Supplement formulations specially formulated for the ADD metabolism and depression:

Limbic ADD is another form of attention deficit, but with the added complication of the brain locked into a negative thought pattern. The other forms of real or true ADHD the inattentive and classic types are resilient and can take knocks, bouncing back. However this type tends to give up easily. Therapy to reset the brain or calm the limbic system, such as some forms of meditation might work well. Stimulant medication is likely to make the condition worse in this ADD type."

The following article is helpful for all types of ADD and I got it from AOL. It was written by Beth W. Orenstein…

“Manage Stress to Stop Procrastinating

When you’re overwhelmed, you’ll find yourself procrastinating more, says Jennifer Koretsky Korey, a senior certified ADHD coach and author of Odd One Out: The Maverick's Guide to Adult ADD. You can manage stress by slowing down and taking excellent care of yourself. “I recommend that clients take half an hour a day — every day — to relax and recharge,” Korey says. Also, prioritize good sleep habits, good nutrition, and exercise. Even small changes in these areas will make a big difference

Plan Your Road to Success

In order to finish something, you first need to know where to start, Korey says. "If you try to jump into a project without planning, it’s easy to become overwhelmed and shut down.” This is sound advice for anyone approaching a task, but it is particularly helpful if you have ADHD. Korey recommends taking 5 to 15 minutes to step back from the project and plan the steps that you need to take to complete it. “Then when you begin,” she says, “the hard work has been done, and you’re really just following a system.”

Break Tasks Into Small Parts

To best manage your ADHD symptoms, not only do you need to plan, but you also need to break down your plan into achievable steps. “I call them ‘doable tasks,’” says Alice Price, a professional organizer and time-management specialist based in West Islip, N.Y., and a member of the National Association of Professional Organizers. Small successes build on each other. Recounts David Rosenberg, MD, professor and chief of child psychiatry and psychology at the Children’s Hospital of Michigan and Wayne State University School of Medicine in Detroit: “My piano teacher used to tell me, rather than memorize the whole piece of music, to learn it in small sections. That’s great advice for learning to play the piano and critical for children with ADHD and people with adult ADHD.”

Create — and Stick to — a Schedule

You need to set a timeline for accomplishing each and every one of the smaller items on your to-do list. If you leave goals open-ended, you won’t be as motivated to get started. Just putting a date and time for completion next to each step will help you stay on track, says Dr. Rosenberg.

Find Motivation to Stop Procrastinating

When given a task, think about how completing it will improve your life. “Get in touch with why the task is actually worth doing and how it can help you,” Korey says. “You’ll definitely procrastinate if you’re just doing the task to please someone else, and you’ll add to your stress as a result.” For instance, if your mother-in-law comments on your messy house, but the clutter doesn’t bother you, you will resist the urge to clean before she comes over. So focus instead on how having a clean house will make achieving your own goals easier.

Delegate, Don't Procrastinate

Whenever possible, delegate any tasks you find boring. “There’s no shame in paying someone else for their skills,” says Korey. “This might mean hiring a house cleaner, a handyman, or even a personal assistant.” If money is an issue, cut out other luxuries so that you can afford the help you need to handle ADHD and stop procrastinating. “Ask yourself what costs more: the stress of procrastinating on this task or the cost of hiring someone else to do it?” Korey suggests.

Reward Yourself

Treat yourself to something fun when you complete half or even a third of an assigned task, and then again when it’s done. The reward can be just a break to watch a TV show, going out to lunch or dinner, or taking a soothing spa bath (great for relaxing when ADHD symptoms have you stressed). Rosenberg says the biggest reward should be contingent upon getting started, which is often the most difficult part for many with adult ADHD. On the flip side, resist punishing yourself for not completing a job. “Punishments rarely work for procrastination and can make things worse,” he cautions.

Do the Dreaded Deed First

Whatever it is, getting the task you dislike out of the way gives your self-esteem a boost, and that in turn stops procrastination. “You feel good because you did it, and it changes your attitude from a negative to a positive,” Price says. Here’s an example: If you work in sales and dislike the part of your job that requires making cold calls, do them first thing in the morning. “Then you have the rest of the day free from having to worry about them,” Price says.

Manage ADHD Symptoms With Set Routines

If you have adult ADHD, establish a routine that includes all tasks that must be accomplished each day, says Rosenberg. That way, doing them becomes almost automatic, because you don’t have time to sit around and think, “I won’t do this now; I’ll do it later.” Set up a routine for getting yourself and your family out the door in the morning. Have one for your workday and others for your evenings and weekends. And be sure to include the tasks you most often put off.”

Also, this may help your ADD- from the WEB MD, web site- http://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/slideshow-brain-foods-that-help-you-concentrate

Eat Breakfast to Fuel Your Brain

Tempted to skip breakfast? Studies have found that eating breakfast may improve short-term memory and attention. Students who eat breakfast tend to perform significantly better than those who don’t. Foods at the top of researchers' brain fuel list include high-fiber whole grains, dairy, and fruits. Just don't overeat; researchers also found high-calorie breakfasts appear to hinder concentration.

Also, add fish, nuts, chocolate, avocados, whole grains (even popcorn,) and blueberries to a healthy diet.’

If you have a big day coming up, eat a breakfast of salmon (on a whole grain bagel if you prefer) and drink a glass of 100% pure fruit juice and a cup of coffee

Other habits to pick up that will increase you attention span every day are getting enough sleep, drinking water to combat dehydration, exercising any time you get the opportunity and meditation.’

I hope everyone who is suffering with any mental disorder will be comforted in knowing there is help out there, and it doesn’t always involve medication. You are NOT alone!

OCD and Brain Fog

I think that Brain Fog is something people should know more about. Brain Fog is just that – you feel unfocused, a bit dazed and you can’t concentrate the way you need to, at work or at school. I have experienced this and believe that there are many others who have also, without realizing the causes. An overworked brain, such as one experiencing OCD or other related disorders, can get foggy very quickly. In researching this, it is not only OCD, there can be many causes of living in a surrealistic state that you may find interesting.

For a correct definition of brain fog, I refer to an interesting article…

BRAIN FOG

by Lawrence Wilson, MD

© January 2011, The Center For Development

“The brain is the crowning organ of the human being. Therefore, dysfunctions involving it are always important. Brain fog is one of the most important symptoms today, even though I have not seen it listed as a diagnosis or recognized health condition in most medical or psychological texts.

A clinical definition of brain fog. Brain fog may be described as feelings of mental confusion or lack of mental clarity. It is called brain fog because it can feel like a cloud that reduces your ability to think clearly. It can cause a person to become forgetful, detached and often discouraged and depressed. It usually is present most of the time, meaning it does not come and go, although it may become better or worse depending on what a person eats, or one’s state of rest and hydration.

Brain fog is not recognized as a clinical diagnosis because it is not easy to test for it. It is quite subjective, in other words. The person just knows that they do not function well, and the mind often seems foggy or cloudy. This is not the same as dementia, mental retardation, anxiety, depression or other common mental symptoms. I hope that medical doctors will soon expand their diagnostic ability to assess brain fog, but for now it is a subjective condition, though it is very real.

Brain fog is quite common. It affects thousands of people, including children as well as adults. It contributes to school and work problems, low self-esteem, accidents, unhappy relationships and often is a factor in crime and delinquency because it can cause intense frustration and inability to function well in society.

The onset of brain fog. Some people have had brain fog for most of their lives, and may even think their state of mind is normal. In some other cases, it comes on slowly with age or time. In still other instances, it may develop almost overnight, perhaps after a mild flu or other illness, or perhaps after a toxic exposure.”

For the complete article-  http://www.drlwilson.com/articles/brain_fog.htm

I found some other information which may be useful to some individuals in figuring out exactly what may be causing their misty state of mind…

“Brain fog affects millions and contributes to unhappiness, poor productivity, failing school grades, crime, job loss, accidents, relationship and a range of social problems.

• Anyone experiencing brain fog can begin by improving diet and lifestyle. Reduce, or preferably, eliminate junk food, heavily sugared foods, and highly processed foods. Reduce, or preferably, eliminate wheat, dairy, and other commonly consumed foods that may be causing sensitivities or allergic reactions. Rather than soda pop, coffee, or juice drink at least 6 glasses of pure water every day (preferably room temperature water as it is easier for the body to process).

• Be sure to get enough sleep, take time to relax, and make a point to breathe deeply throughout the day. Detoxification methods like cleanses, colonic irrigation, and saunas can be very helpful - for many, radically life changing.

• In some cases, testing for allergies, illnesses, and brain diseases may be necessary. Brain fog caused by diet, lifestyle, toxicity, medication, spinal misalignments, and blood sugar imbalances does not show up in conventional medical tests.

• Visit a chiropractor or osteopath to rule out structural causes.

• Reduce levels of brain stress. Many people find meditation extremely helpful to feel calmer, more focussed, and have a stronger sense of well being.”

For the full article-

http://www.brainharmonycenter.com/brain-fog.html

I hope this helps, and if you do have Brain Fog, I hope the fog lifts and the skies are sunny and clear for all!

OCD and Emotional Protection

Many people are very sensitive to the comments and opionions of others. Even a casual remark can wound and penetrate a fragile psyche, especially that of a vulnerable child. Many people with OCD can fall victim to the ctiticism of others. Some react by arguing or fighting, others by withdrawing into themselves.

What we may not realize is that many times, people who criticize or point out the flaws of others are doing so because of their own self insecurities and lack of self confidence. By exposing other people’s weaknesses, they hide their own.

Having said that, we are often our own victims. I think that in this world of technology and global instant communication, it is possible give out too much information about ourselves, which make people easy targets. Does everyone really have to know when you have your period, or that you were hung over and didn’t make it to work on time? Be aware of spontaneous Facebook postings which will bite you in the end. That goes for emotional textings as well. Does your entire addres book have to get a fowarded message from your ex boyfriend about how you hate him because he used you and dumped you? Once you write it, it is there forever to haunt you.

Here is a very good quote from Don Miguel Ruiz…

“Don’t Take Anything Personally. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.”

Don Miguel Ruiz

I found this on a site – Seven Simple Steps to Inner Peace…

“If we depend on the opinions and praise of other people, we can never have inner peace. Criticism and flattery are two sides of the same coin. They are both the judgements of others. However, we should not allow ourselves to be affected by either. When we do, we feed the ego. We should learn to have confidence in ourselves. This does not mean we will love ourselves in an egotistical way, it means we value our real self and have belief in the good qualities that are part of everyone.” For the full artcle on Inner Peace… http://www.srichinmoybio.co.uk/blog/inner-peace/seven-simple-steps-to-inner-peace/

Here’s to protection from useless and unwanted criticism and an abundance of inner peace!

OCD and the Loss of a Pet

It's a well known fact that many people with OCD suffer with bouts of depression. What I recently realized is that severe depression can be set off by the loss of a pet.


My beloved cat Remy, who was my constant companion for the past 18 years, is gone. I am lost and desperately lonely without her. Nothing is the same anymore without her by my side, following me everywhere (even doing the laundry with me) sleeping with me, and even sitting on my lap while I wrote this blog so many times before.

I have been crying for the past two weeks and I feel extremely depressed. Having OCD, I know this feeling well and I dread it. I know I must pull myself out of it or the consequences will not be good for me, or for anyone around me. If anyone reading this is depressed, my first advice would to do whatever you can to NOT give in to it. Even though I really would rather stay in bed, I have been forcing myself to get up and keep moving. I have been taking inositol, which also helps OCD as well as calcuim and chromium to balance my blood sugar, since my appetite has been destroyed.

People have been very nice to me- the outpouring of sympathy from family and friends is really appreciated. I still have a void inside, which I'm hoping doesn't turn into s sink-hole. And my OCD is acting up, but I still have it under control. And for those who say "It's just a cat," my response is unprintable.

I am paying extra attention to my remaining cat "Squeaky Mouse" who has been Remy's companion for the past 9 years. She is a sweet cat and comforting presence. She is feeling this too and I don't know what to do about her feelings at this point.

I went online to see what else could lift me out of this mess. I don't want to hear any Rainbow Bridge BS or things like that, personally they do not help me quell my anger and frustration about a situation I can do nothing about. It sucks that pets don't live as long as people - can't someone do something? There are advances in science all the time!

The thing that helped me the most so far is this article  from http://cats.about.com/cs/copingwithloss/a/dealingwithloss.htm

It is about Cats, but I think it would apply to any one suffering the loss of a pet...


Surviving the Loss of Your Cat


How to Deal With the Loss of a Beloved Cat and Move Forward Again

By Franny Syufy, About.com Guide

"It hurts. You feel real physical pain-- a black hole in the center of you that once was filled with love and laughter and joy. Now it is a void, only filled with emptiness. You sob for days, and just when you think you've shed your last tear, you chance upon a memento: a worn-out sock in the corner of the room, a dish you had customized with your beloved's name, and the tears flood again. Finally, one day, you accept your emptiness and your eyes become as dry and barren as your heart. "I'll never, NEVER replace him (her)", you state vehemently, when friends timidly approach the subject.

Frequent visitors to this site will know immediately that I am not talking about the loss of a spouse, or even a child, although the emotions are just as real. I'm talking about the loss of your cat, who perhaps was the only creature on Earth who loved you unconditionally. "What's the big deal? It was only a cat. Get over it." Most friends will not be crass enough to voice this opinion, but you can still sense the unspoken words in some.

Here are some Dos and Don'ts for helping to ease the pain of the loss of a cat:

•Do: Allow yourself to cry. Holding back the tears will only stuff all that emotion inside, where it will fester until it surfaces again at unforeseen times.

•Don't: Try to tough it out alone. If you have children, don't feel that you have to be "strong" for them. Sit with your child and say, "I'm sad because Tuffy died, aren't you?" and let the conversation go where it will. You'll not only help yourself, but also you will help your child develop coping skills

•Do: If you are of a creative bent, create a memorial album for your departed cat, or make a 3-dimensional shadow box with memorabilia of your cat. You can also create an online memorial on this site with up to two photos, using a form. (See the top link underneath this article.)

•Do: Talk to an empathetic friend, preferably one who loves cats as much as you. If you don't have any close friends or family members that you feel would understand, visit the About Cats Forum. We have a special folder for Support and Encouragement, and everyone, old or new members alike, draw an enormous amount of comfort from this supportive community.

•Don't: Write off the thought of ever sharing your life with another cat. We'll talk more about that on the next page.

•Do: Focus on things that make you happy. Sometimes we forget to fully appreciate the beauty around us, until we are forced to think about what we've lost.

Take time to share an intimate minute with someone you love. If you have other cats or dogs, spend additional time with them. They may be suffering the same kind of lost feelings you have, and will appreciate knowing that you are not also going to leave.

Take the time to smell the flowers, glory at a magnificent sunset, listen to some good music, or pick up a book of poetry. Have lunch with a good friend; see a "feel-good" movie, or rent a video or DVD and enjoy a film at home. As much as you may hate to face it, life does have a way of going on, and time really does heal these wounds."

I hope no one else is going through this, but if you are, I'm  very sorry and know exactly how you feel.